The Naughty McGrew’s

Compiled by Teresa Martin Klaiber Feb. 2020

I have several genealogical lines that embraced the Quaker faith.  The Society of Friends was founded in England, by George Fox.  They believed that God exists in every person and believed in spiritual equality for men and women alike.  They were pacifists that in many cases refused to take legal oaths nor fight.  They were abolitionists in Colonial America. 

They were forbidden to marry outside their faith. They were forbidden to bear arms. While they were not forbidden to drink alcohol they were forbidden to drink in excess.  They dressed plainly and were forbidden to dance.  Almost everything they did in colonial time was reported to a committee set up for both men and women in their faith.

I have a double direct McGrew line on my maternal side.  Two McGrew sisters married eventually bringing their lines back together, while another sister married into another yet another branch of my family.  At least 11% of the dna flowing in my veins is Scotch Irish from both my maternal and paternal family.

There were nine children in Finley And Dinah Cox McGrew’s family.  Both Finley and wife Dinah Cox McGrew are buried in Sewickley Friends Cemetery, Westmoreland County, Pennsylvania.  Finley was active on many committees, as required, in the Quaker minutes. Their first son John was born in October 1760. 

The second son, James Cox McGrew was born in 1762. James Cox McGrew kicked up his heels a bit.  The committee took action.  The 13^th day of the 3^rd month 1786: 

“Whereas James McGrew son of Finley had a right of membership amongst us the people called Quakers but hath given way so far to a libertine spirit as to be guilty of taking strong drink to excess and dancing for which disorderly conduct we disown him the same James McGrew from being any longer a member of our Religious Society until his future recommend him worthy.”[i]

I especially like the use of the word libertine in the written record. While the definition means without moral principles it also represents a free thinker in the matters of religion. 

But James Cox McGrew was not the first sibling to get in trouble with the church.  Mary, daughter of Finley and Dinah McGrew was written up in the Menallen Women’s Monthly Meeting 12 day 1^st month of 1784.

"Huntingdon Meeting informs that Mary the daughter of Finely [sic] McGrew hath left the parts in a disorderly manner with a young man in the night season which being considered in this meeting it is thought best to appoint a friend to unite with Men friends in writing to some friends of Hopewell Monthly Meeting and endeavour to inform themselves whether or no or in what manner she was married, therefore Alice Hendricks is appointed for that service who is desired to report to a future meeting."

Mary had married 25 September 1784 Jacob Ong. Jacob’s father was Jeremiah Ong. (Mary McGrew Ong is the compilers 5^th great aunt).

4 Jun 1784: Menallen Monthly Meeting minutes: "The Friends appointed in the case of Mary Ong, formerly McGrew report they performed the service and a testimony was produced to this meeting which was approved and signed being as follow viz Whereas Mary Ong formerly McGrew hath had a birth right amongst us the people called Quakers but hath so far given away to a libertine spirit as to go away in a disorderly manner with a young man in the night season to whom we are since informed she is married contrary to the good order used amongst Friends, for which misconduct we do hereby disown her the said Mary Ong to be any longer a member of our society untill her future conduct recommend her worthy which that it may is our desire for her.”

There is that use of libertine spirit again. It is believed that Jacob Ong while likely born a Quaker was already disowned for having served in the Continental Army (8th Regt, Pennsylvania Line) during the Revolution.  Later records indicate they were restored to the faith and appear in Hopewell Friends records before migrating to Jefferson County, Ohio.

Next in line of children born to Finley and Dinah Cox McGrew was Nathan born the 1^st day 6^th month 1765.  Just before his 18^th birthday Nathan celebrates, and like his siblings is reprimanded.  Three representatives “had the opportunity with him since last meeting and inspected in his conduct and acknowledged that he had been guilty of horse racing and dancing and they were of the mind that he was not in… situation of mind to condemn his misconduct…prevailing for this restoration…” [ii] Three more people of the faith were appointed to pay him another visit.  Apparently, horses were in the “blood.”  James Cox McGrew is thought to have raised and sold horses.

The Pennsylvania German and Swiss, enjoyed folk dance, especially enjoying the fiddle.  The Scotch and Irish of other faiths enjoyed their music and a hornpipe was made by Pennsylvanian, John Durang.[iii]  There were taverns and halls for dancing jigs and English reels.    It is not hard to envision the Quaker youth being drawn to the festivities of their neighbors.[iv]

As a mother I can only imagine how stressful these infractions were to their parents who followed the faith so closely.  They wished their children the best and that included their own religious training.  At this writing, the compiler finds only one child, Finley (Jr.), that the parents can praise for not being called upon for an infraction.   With a sigh, the siblings were not done expressing themselves.

Dinah (born the 9^th day 3^rd moth of 1769, named for her mother), before her 17^th birthday along with younger sister Rebecca, only 15 years old, are caught dancing.  “…hath been guilty of dancing therefore this meeting appoints Susanna Wright and Mary Garretson to unite with Men Friends in treating with them on that account and support their sence of the situation of their minds to next meeting.”  The case continues for several visits with the girls.  Dinah married John Hoop and this compiler’s ancestor, Rebecca survives her punishment and marries James A. Mains in the Menallen Monthly Meeting in 1788.  Rebecca McGrew Mains is this compiler’s fifth great grandmother.  Rebecca McGrew Mains died the 10th day 11th month 1852 and is buried in the Friends Cemtery, Sewickley, Westmoreland County, Pennsylvania, long forgiven for her youthful indeiscretion with dance.  

Oh, yet again, we are not done with our story.  The youngest daughter of Finley and Dinah Cox McGrew, born 10 September 1776, at sweet 16 marries Presbyterian, William Wilson  (Also the compiler’s fifth great grandparents).  A bible record indicates they were married 18 Oct 1792.[v]  Providence Preparative Meeting “…informs that Margaret Wilson formerly McGrew hath accomplished her marriage with a man not of our society by the assistance of a magistrate. This meeting appoints Mary Coope and Susannah Talbot to join Men Friends in a visit to her endeavor to lay before her the inconsistency of their conduct and without sufficient cause to forbear prepare a testimony against her…next meeting.”[vi] 

The youngest son  of Finley and Dinah Mcgrew, Jacob was born circa 1779.  When about 21 years old he married his cousin Jane McGrew, the daughter of James Blackburn McGrew and Elizabeth McFerran McGrew.[vii]  The minutes for the 6^th mo 1800 and 7^th month 1801 state “The Friends of Jacob and Jane McGrew’s case report the service is performed and have returned the testimony being as follows – Whereas Jacob McGrew and Jane his wife (they being first cousins) that so far deviated from the good order established amongst us as to accomplish their marriage by the assistance of a hireling teacher for which we disown them from membership with us until they…become sensible of their error and make satisfaction to Friends which that they may is our desire.”[viii] [ix]  It is not unusual to find cousin marriages when doing early genealogy.  The Quaker’s were ahead of their time concerning this rule for first cousins.  Two generations later George Graham would marry Mary Jane Mains, 2^nd cousins plus man and wife.

All of these siblings were active in their communities, raised children that went on in many walks of life.  If not for those that pushed the limits of things they questioned or did not believe in, I would not be writing today with music playing in the background.  One of my fondest memories is my mother carefully cleaning a record and placing it on the record player, swaying to the music.  She showed me how she did the jitter bug in high school with a huge smile on her face.  She also insisted I take cotillion lessons along with social etiquette of the 1950’s. My first date was at the Country Club for a dance. I must say my dance card was usually full during my teen years, thanks to her guidance.

It is simpler to end this tale of religious disobedience with a chart that explains my relationship of the McGrew’s, Mains and Ong family for the reader.

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[i] Swarthmore College, Swarthmore, Pennsylvania, Minutes, 1780-1811; Collection: Baltimore Yearly Meeting Minutes; Call Number: RG2/B/M461 1.1.

[ii] Swarthmore College, Swarthmore, Pennsylvania, Baltimore Yearly Meeting Minutes; Call Number: RG2/B/M461 1.1.

[iii] https://www.colonialmusic.org/colonial-music-resources/2-uncategorised/32-dances-of-colonial-america.html

[iv] Wood, Robert, “Tavern Frolics” Berks-Mont. Berksmontnews.com. 11 Jul 2016

[v] Dinah Ann [Wilson] Graham, first edition (Marietta, Ohio: Richardson Printing Corp., 1967), Page 17, 18.

[vi] Swarthmore College; Swarthmore, Pennsylvania; Women's Minutes, 1786-1823; Collection: Quaker Meeting Records; Call Number: MR-O-0050, Page 77.

[vii] James Blackburn McGrew is a brother of Finley McGrew who married Dinah Cox.

[viii] Swarthmore College, Swarthmore, Pennsylvania, Minutes, 1783-1804; Collection: Quaker Meeting Records; Call Number: RG2/O/R44 1.1 page 296

[ix] Swarthmore College, Swarthmore, Pennsylvania, Minutes, 1793-1804; Collection: Quaker Meeting Records; Call Number: MR-O-0051. Given from Redstone

Ong’s Hat

Ong’s Hat

Compiled by Teresa Martin Klaiber February 2020

While living in New Jersey, we learned a lot about the state’s history. The boys learned to fish in the creek near our home in Marlton, and learned to swim in Medford’s lakes which look much like tinted tea caused by the cedar trees, filtered and fresh.  We visited Rancocas Nature Center, near Willingboro and took drives in the Pine Barrens.  Displaced Kentuckians and Ohio buckeyes, we enjoyed meeting those in southern New Jersey who proclaimed they were “Pineys.”

One of my favorite past times with my hubby and sons,  was a Sunday drive seeing all the unusual village and town names. Near the Rancocas Nature Center is Timbuctoo, in Burlington County, which was founded by former slaves in 1826.  The Battle of Pine Swamp took place there when residents took up arms to protect an escaped slave from a slave catcher as late as 1860. 

We visited Ship Bottom, Egg Harbor (said named because hungry Dutch sailors found sea gull eggs to sustain them), and Ong’s Hat.  By the time we visited Ong’s Hat in the 1970’s, only a  sign proclaimed the name with a hand painted Top Hat. A simple road sign along Ong’s Hat Road, in Pemberton Township, proclaimed what once was an active area.  Blink twice and you drive past it.  This is one of several deserted villages in the Pine Barrens.

Lore has many versions of how Ong’s Hat got the name. It was said to be a stagecoach stop on the route from Philadelphia.  Jacob Ong got angry, being a bit tipsy, and tossed his black silk top hat (WPA Guide to NJ 1930’s calls it a chimney pot hat[i]) which landed high in a tree, when a young lady refused to dance with him. 

The hat remained in a large tree for years and when someone rode by would exclaim “there’s Ong’s Hat.”  An article in the New York Times in 1968 states that the family lived at Little Egg Harbor and transported grain, building a hut,  naming it Ong’s Hut which later corrupted to Ong’s Hat.  I like the first version. It was later known as a great place for bootleggers during the 1930’s[ii].

I was able to locate a Revolutionary map in 1778 that marks the location as simply “Ong’s.”  A Gazetteer of the State of New Jersey by Thomas Gordon in 1834 names it “Ong’s Hat” describing it as a hamlet ten miles south east of Mount Holly. 

By the time we discovered Ong’s Hat, I was well on my trail as a family researcher and knew that a tiny bit of Ong dna flowed through my veins.  Jacob Ong Jr. is this compiler’s 7^th great grandfather. He was named for his father Jacob Ong Sr.

The Ong’s were of Quaker faith.  Founder George Fox believed that they should not indulge in art, dancing, playing cards or gambling.  If they “kicked up their heels” one would be duly reprimanded and recorded in the Quaker minutes.  Jacob Ong Sr. does not appear to have been chastised, while residing in Mansfield Township in August 1698, when riding his horse at a gallop during the fair between the “Market house and the water side.  He was, however, arrested but the charges were dropped when no one appeared in court to prosecute him.[iii]   The next year (2.1699) Jacob and Elizabeth Ong’s first son Isaac was born.  Mayhap he was celebrating the news that he was going to be a father?

Within two years after this galloping incident Jacob Sr. purchased 100 acres in Northampton township.  The land appears to include the area described as Ong’s Hat.  Pemberton Township was formed in 1846 from a portion of Northampton along with New Hanover township.  Quaker records show that Jacob and Elizabeth named their 2^nd son Jacob when he was born the 3^rd day of the 3^rd month in 1703.

Jacob Ong Jr. thus grew up in the Pine Barrens with Quaker monthly meetings at Little Egg Harbor 29.6 miles from Ong’s.  Jacob Ong Jr.’s marriage to Mary Spragg is recorded in the Little Egg Harbor Monthly Meeting 12 December 1723 and reported to the Philadelphia Yearly for their minutes as well.  Jacob Jr. was 20 years of age when he pledged his troth.  Did he impress the ladies? Was he spurned, swaggering about in his chimney pot style hat, prior to Mary Spragg taking his hand?  Must every folk lore be debunked by serious researchers?  I think not because they add a human touch and charm to tales of our ancestors.  

Genealogy can be so cut and dry with cited references on a chart that does not express the personality of those that went before us.   Let’s ride our horses, with the breeze kissing us in the face, kick up our heels, toss our hats to the sky and dance like there is no tomorrow.

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[i] Chimney Pot hat is more descriptive of Quaker’s hats

[ii] Beck, Henry. Forgotten Towns of Southern New Jersey. 1936.

[iii] Honeyman, Abraham Van Doren. New Jersey Law Journal Vol. 15. 1892. Plainfield NJ, NJ Law Journal Publishing Company

Mains Family Research Opens doors to Friends

compiled by Teresa Martin Klaiber 

April 2011

Those of us that live in Eastern Kentucky have rich histories from all corners of the world.  My maternal line has wonderful Quaker heritage dotted with great stories including the Mains, McGrew and Ong families.

Today there are three Friends Meeting Houses in Kentucky: Berea, Louisville and Lexington.  Least you think Kentucky does not have Quaker heritage let me remind you that Daniel Boone was a Quaker.  Dear Myrtle addressed migration of Quakers into Kentucky in her advise column which is very informative.

As I sat down to scan my Mains family materials I realized that I have not reviewed these treasured documents in some time.  I descend from Culbert Mains who died in 1761 in York County, Pennsylvania by his son Robert Mains.  

I joined the NSDAR, in the state of New Jersey, under Robert Mains in 1979 [#635867].  Robert was a Pvt. 8th Class in the Cumberland County Militia 6th Battalion. Looking at the application I am flooded with memories.  Both the Regent, Rowena Robinson Billos, and Registrar, Esther Adalaide Gerald,  dear friends, are now deceased as is one of the ladies that endorsed my papers.  My sons called her the "Cookie lady."  Kathryn Burkley never failed to give my sons healthy oatmeal cookies and was honored to get the name. Her friendship brings back many memories. The final endorsement was by my now lifelong close friend Denise Plested.

It is not just researching and learning about your ancestors but about the journey and the people and friends you make along the way.  When I started looking at the Mains family I was quickly told to contact a distant cousin in Cambridge, Ohio.  Little did I know how that journey would play out.

Mary Bernice Johns did not just hand me the genealogy I was seeking.  She rather gave me a treasured scavenger hunt.  It was the early 1970's and we resided in New Jersey.  I would ask a question and in return receive little cards and messages with rhymes saying "If you look for - such and such book - you might find a clue."  With little children under tow I would seek out the valued item or publication and then write her once again excited with my find.   I especially enjoyed a one line note that said simply "You know you have a link to Ong's Hat."  What fun!  Of course we visited Ong's Hat.  

Blessed living within proximity of the Pennsylvania Historical Society, Swarthmore, Rutgers and many other resources I began to put together the proper lineage.

Little did I know that in just a few years our relationship would grow and our lives would touch each others.  In time our personal lives took us back to beloved Ohio where I realized I was just a few short miles from Mary Johns home.  I could not wait to meet this lady who seemed to be such a character.  I carefully followed directions to her home.  It was not hard to find.

 

Mary Bernice Johns lived in a two story pink house - solid pink - really pink and not hard to find.  I was greeted with "If you want anything I have you must wait til I die."  I assured her I came to see her and was a bit confused by that first greeting.  But something told me this meeting was good for both of us.  I told her I had saved every note she had mailed me.  She cackled loudly and said "I was afraid you would not write any more if I gave it all to you at once."  I quickly realized she was lonely and I looked forward to our friendship.

Mary Bernice Johns  never married and spent her life teaching in Cambridge, Ohio.  She was devoted to her only brother Llewellyn James Johns [1899-2002].  As I crossed the threshold I entered a world of large floral pink everything.  She proudly told me she had even designed the carpet that matched the pink floral drapes.  

She had extraordinary ideas.  Besides teaching she created and patented several glass paperweights.  

Mary was born 20 March 1902 in Westmoreland County, Pennsylvania.  She was the daughter of John Arthur Johns and Armintha Brown.  Her recall was wonderful and we had many chats about ancestors and her genealogy adventures.  Our visits eventually included trips to the doctors and dentist as she struggled to stay independent.  Finally one day she called and said she had checked herself into the nursing home.  

Visits in the nursing home were short as she declined and a guardianship auction was arranged.  True to her character instructions were carried out by her brother's caregiver and her Power of Attorney.  The auctioneer called stating that when they moved the items for auction there were instructions for boxes of genealogy that I was to share with another cousin on the Brown side.  At that time I had no idea that these materials would include correspondence beginning in 1925 that would become instrumental in my continued research.

Besides the materials that were set aside for us, I attended the auction.    The following describes some of her beloved belongings  from the letter I wrote the Brown cousin the following day.  "...the teddy bear brought $900.00 as did the carpet in the living room.  The corner cabinet brought $2,700.00.  One piece that drew my attention was a ...chest...that the auctioneer described as about 1810 made in western PA.  ...enclosed are the tin types ...two brown envelopes are stock pictures...majority ...are marked as McKeesport or the area...there were over seven whale oil lamps...None sold for less than $200.00...The only piece that you may be disappointed that I did not purchase was a stock photograph of a stage and team with a sign across the stage stating Arkansas Transport.  There were four or five in the open stage and the driver.  the back said simply "J. A. Brown."...it sold for $65.00...I purchased some of her original art for the paperweights, a piece of copper luster creamer and...Among her original art work [paper weight] were notarized statements  that these were her original designs ...I will place them in the Cambridge Museum..." 

I was also contacted by the real estate agent that needed books and left over papers cleared from the house.  I am so thankful for that call for we retrieved even more family history and donated historical books to the school library where she had taught.

Mary Bernice Johns died 4 March 1994.  As my husband and I walked into the funeral we thought we were in the wrong place.  Only two gentleman were in attendance: her brother and his caregiver.  Llewelyn hugged and thanked me for being her friend.  We quietly waited and not one single person attended this woman's final good byes.  I had no idea that besides being a distant cousin that I truly was the only friend she seemed to have in the end.  No matter what her life had been with others she had been a good mentor to me in many ways.   She is buried in Mt. Vernon Cemetery, Allegheny County, Pennsylvania.

Among the correspondents and materials are letters from Scott Lee Boyd author of The Boyd Family and Leota Huemme Koontz author of the Koontz Family And Relatives. Photographs included a circa 1930's view of Finley Mains home in Sewickley Township, Westmoreland County, Pennsylvania.  Comparing with 1979 photographs provided by a fellow researcher the house had weathered well.

 Not only did this portion of my life journey teach me about my Quaker Friends heritage I acquired many new friends.

Often I think we pursue our genealogy quest and correspond with many, even more so, with internet technology, without really taking the time to get to know the people sharing the information. Every person mentioned has left me with a lesson in life and I am a better person for knowing each of them.

Mary Bernice Johns, Armintha Brown Johns, Nancy Mains Brown , Jacob Mains, Finley Mains & wife Jane Watson, James Mains & wife Rebecca McGrew, Robert Mains, Culbert Mains.

Teresa Lynn Martin, Mary Helen Feyler Martin, Howard Clayton Feyler, Dessie Mae Clayton Feyler, Anna Jane Graham Clayton, Mary Jane Mains Graham, Finley Mains & wife Jane Watson, James Mains & wife Rebecca McGrew, Robert Mains, Culbert Mains.