The Naughty McGrew’s

Compiled by Teresa Martin Klaiber Feb. 2020

I have several genealogical lines that embraced the Quaker faith.  The Society of Friends was founded in England, by George Fox.  They believed that God exists in every person and believed in spiritual equality for men and women alike.  They were pacifists that in many cases refused to take legal oaths nor fight.  They were abolitionists in Colonial America. 

They were forbidden to marry outside their faith. They were forbidden to bear arms. While they were not forbidden to drink alcohol they were forbidden to drink in excess.  They dressed plainly and were forbidden to dance.  Almost everything they did in colonial time was reported to a committee set up for both men and women in their faith.

I have a double direct McGrew line on my maternal side.  Two McGrew sisters married eventually bringing their lines back together, while another sister married into another yet another branch of my family.  At least 11% of the dna flowing in my veins is Scotch Irish from both my maternal and paternal family.

There were nine children in Finley And Dinah Cox McGrew’s family.  Both Finley and wife Dinah Cox McGrew are buried in Sewickley Friends Cemetery, Westmoreland County, Pennsylvania.  Finley was active on many committees, as required, in the Quaker minutes. Their first son John was born in October 1760. 

The second son, James Cox McGrew was born in 1762. James Cox McGrew kicked up his heels a bit.  The committee took action.  The 13^th day of the 3^rd month 1786: 

“Whereas James McGrew son of Finley had a right of membership amongst us the people called Quakers but hath given way so far to a libertine spirit as to be guilty of taking strong drink to excess and dancing for which disorderly conduct we disown him the same James McGrew from being any longer a member of our Religious Society until his future recommend him worthy.”[i]

I especially like the use of the word libertine in the written record. While the definition means without moral principles it also represents a free thinker in the matters of religion. 

But James Cox McGrew was not the first sibling to get in trouble with the church.  Mary, daughter of Finley and Dinah McGrew was written up in the Menallen Women’s Monthly Meeting 12 day 1^st month of 1784.

"Huntingdon Meeting informs that Mary the daughter of Finely [sic] McGrew hath left the parts in a disorderly manner with a young man in the night season which being considered in this meeting it is thought best to appoint a friend to unite with Men friends in writing to some friends of Hopewell Monthly Meeting and endeavour to inform themselves whether or no or in what manner she was married, therefore Alice Hendricks is appointed for that service who is desired to report to a future meeting."

Mary had married 25 September 1784 Jacob Ong. Jacob’s father was Jeremiah Ong. (Mary McGrew Ong is the compilers 5^th great aunt).

4 Jun 1784: Menallen Monthly Meeting minutes: "The Friends appointed in the case of Mary Ong, formerly McGrew report they performed the service and a testimony was produced to this meeting which was approved and signed being as follow viz Whereas Mary Ong formerly McGrew hath had a birth right amongst us the people called Quakers but hath so far given away to a libertine spirit as to go away in a disorderly manner with a young man in the night season to whom we are since informed she is married contrary to the good order used amongst Friends, for which misconduct we do hereby disown her the said Mary Ong to be any longer a member of our society untill her future conduct recommend her worthy which that it may is our desire for her.”

There is that use of libertine spirit again. It is believed that Jacob Ong while likely born a Quaker was already disowned for having served in the Continental Army (8th Regt, Pennsylvania Line) during the Revolution.  Later records indicate they were restored to the faith and appear in Hopewell Friends records before migrating to Jefferson County, Ohio.

Next in line of children born to Finley and Dinah Cox McGrew was Nathan born the 1^st day 6^th month 1765.  Just before his 18^th birthday Nathan celebrates, and like his siblings is reprimanded.  Three representatives “had the opportunity with him since last meeting and inspected in his conduct and acknowledged that he had been guilty of horse racing and dancing and they were of the mind that he was not in… situation of mind to condemn his misconduct…prevailing for this restoration…” [ii] Three more people of the faith were appointed to pay him another visit.  Apparently, horses were in the “blood.”  James Cox McGrew is thought to have raised and sold horses.

The Pennsylvania German and Swiss, enjoyed folk dance, especially enjoying the fiddle.  The Scotch and Irish of other faiths enjoyed their music and a hornpipe was made by Pennsylvanian, John Durang.[iii]  There were taverns and halls for dancing jigs and English reels.    It is not hard to envision the Quaker youth being drawn to the festivities of their neighbors.[iv]

As a mother I can only imagine how stressful these infractions were to their parents who followed the faith so closely.  They wished their children the best and that included their own religious training.  At this writing, the compiler finds only one child, Finley (Jr.), that the parents can praise for not being called upon for an infraction.   With a sigh, the siblings were not done expressing themselves.

Dinah (born the 9^th day 3^rd moth of 1769, named for her mother), before her 17^th birthday along with younger sister Rebecca, only 15 years old, are caught dancing.  “…hath been guilty of dancing therefore this meeting appoints Susanna Wright and Mary Garretson to unite with Men Friends in treating with them on that account and support their sence of the situation of their minds to next meeting.”  The case continues for several visits with the girls.  Dinah married John Hoop and this compiler’s ancestor, Rebecca survives her punishment and marries James A. Mains in the Menallen Monthly Meeting in 1788.  Rebecca McGrew Mains is this compiler’s fifth great grandmother.  Rebecca McGrew Mains died the 10th day 11th month 1852 and is buried in the Friends Cemtery, Sewickley, Westmoreland County, Pennsylvania, long forgiven for her youthful indeiscretion with dance.  

Oh, yet again, we are not done with our story.  The youngest daughter of Finley and Dinah Cox McGrew, born 10 September 1776, at sweet 16 marries Presbyterian, William Wilson  (Also the compiler’s fifth great grandparents).  A bible record indicates they were married 18 Oct 1792.[v]  Providence Preparative Meeting “…informs that Margaret Wilson formerly McGrew hath accomplished her marriage with a man not of our society by the assistance of a magistrate. This meeting appoints Mary Coope and Susannah Talbot to join Men Friends in a visit to her endeavor to lay before her the inconsistency of their conduct and without sufficient cause to forbear prepare a testimony against her…next meeting.”[vi] 

The youngest son  of Finley and Dinah Mcgrew, Jacob was born circa 1779.  When about 21 years old he married his cousin Jane McGrew, the daughter of James Blackburn McGrew and Elizabeth McFerran McGrew.[vii]  The minutes for the 6^th mo 1800 and 7^th month 1801 state “The Friends of Jacob and Jane McGrew’s case report the service is performed and have returned the testimony being as follows – Whereas Jacob McGrew and Jane his wife (they being first cousins) that so far deviated from the good order established amongst us as to accomplish their marriage by the assistance of a hireling teacher for which we disown them from membership with us until they…become sensible of their error and make satisfaction to Friends which that they may is our desire.”[viii] [ix]  It is not unusual to find cousin marriages when doing early genealogy.  The Quaker’s were ahead of their time concerning this rule for first cousins.  Two generations later George Graham would marry Mary Jane Mains, 2^nd cousins plus man and wife.

All of these siblings were active in their communities, raised children that went on in many walks of life.  If not for those that pushed the limits of things they questioned or did not believe in, I would not be writing today with music playing in the background.  One of my fondest memories is my mother carefully cleaning a record and placing it on the record player, swaying to the music.  She showed me how she did the jitter bug in high school with a huge smile on her face.  She also insisted I take cotillion lessons along with social etiquette of the 1950’s. My first date was at the Country Club for a dance. I must say my dance card was usually full during my teen years, thanks to her guidance.

It is simpler to end this tale of religious disobedience with a chart that explains my relationship of the McGrew’s, Mains and Ong family for the reader.

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[i] Swarthmore College, Swarthmore, Pennsylvania, Minutes, 1780-1811; Collection: Baltimore Yearly Meeting Minutes; Call Number: RG2/B/M461 1.1.

[ii] Swarthmore College, Swarthmore, Pennsylvania, Baltimore Yearly Meeting Minutes; Call Number: RG2/B/M461 1.1.

[iii] https://www.colonialmusic.org/colonial-music-resources/2-uncategorised/32-dances-of-colonial-america.html

[iv] Wood, Robert, “Tavern Frolics” Berks-Mont. Berksmontnews.com. 11 Jul 2016

[v] Dinah Ann [Wilson] Graham, first edition (Marietta, Ohio: Richardson Printing Corp., 1967), Page 17, 18.

[vi] Swarthmore College; Swarthmore, Pennsylvania; Women's Minutes, 1786-1823; Collection: Quaker Meeting Records; Call Number: MR-O-0050, Page 77.

[vii] James Blackburn McGrew is a brother of Finley McGrew who married Dinah Cox.

[viii] Swarthmore College, Swarthmore, Pennsylvania, Minutes, 1783-1804; Collection: Quaker Meeting Records; Call Number: RG2/O/R44 1.1 page 296

[ix] Swarthmore College, Swarthmore, Pennsylvania, Minutes, 1793-1804; Collection: Quaker Meeting Records; Call Number: MR-O-0051. Given from Redstone

The Disappearance of William Graham

Compiled by Teresa Martin Klaiber 2020

Bernice Graham, author of Graham Descendants of William and Dinah Wilson Graham, 1967 was the glue that kept Graham family members, far and wide, together.  The Graham descendants in Portsmouth, Ohio diligently filled out or wrote her yearly with  updates of family births, marriages and deaths.  Her book was published when I was a senior in high school.  On a hot summer day in the late 1980’s I paid her a visit in Marietta, Ohio.  Surrounded by stacks of newspapers, that she said she still must clip and file, we chatted about our family.  Close to 90 years of age, Bernice’s mind was bright and sharp. 

I asked who had supplied my birth information. She promptly said my grandmother.  She said my grandmother, Katherine Halderman Feyler,  would write her notes but my great aunt Eva Clayton Scott was more informative.  She also stated she had letters from my great grandmother Dessie Clayton Feyler.  Graham then directed me to go to the basement between isles, count two stacks then down three boxes and bring the box upstairs.  That box was just like Christmas morning.  Crammed full of letters from the descendants of George Graham son of William Graham.    There were several letters from my great grandmother Dessie Clayton Feyler from the 1920’s and 30’s.[i] Without hesitation she reached in and located the letter announcing my birth from my grandmother.  After getting permission to photostat some of the letters, I was prompted to take the box back to the basement and place it exactly as I had found it.

By the time of that visit, I had already worn the pages of my copy of her publication, the culmination of all those letters and questions, on the eleven children and descendants of William and Dinah Anne Wilson Graham.  As we walked to the library, that day, to make copies, I asked her if there was more to the story of the disappearance of William Graham.  She shook her head no and said that her 2^nd great grandmother, Dinah Wilson Graham, was said to have mourned and hoped he would return all the rest of her life.

The first part of her book reads more like a thought process, explaining why Bernice believed William was the son of Jared Graham.  She cites bible records and stories from various branches of the family as well as trips she and her brother, an avid McGrew researcher, made to Westmoreland County, Pennsylvania.  Sometimes she gave a proper deed citation and other times just descriptions. 

Over the years Graham researchers are still hoping, new technology and ease of retrieving original records, we will unravel the mystery of William Graham’s disappearance.

William Graham’s birth is given as 25 August 1793.  Bernice stated: "I have an old bible published in 1816 which William Graham wrote ...data for most of his family. His signature is also written beside the 19th chapter of Proverbs...given me a few years ago by Reba West Wilson a granddaughter of Rebecca Ross Graham."  In today’s analytical genealogy world we immediately would question if the birth date was primary (written by him from knowledge) or secondary evidence since the bible was not published until after his birth.

Bernice goes on to say that William was a farmer, storekeeper, teacher and hat maker making beaver hats especially.    In referencing William Graham as a teacher:  “ .. arithmetic book in possession of my grandfather Dickson Graham...copyright 1811...used by Wm Graham while teaching school at Youngstown, Pennsylvania...inscribed his signature...Youngstown...date Feb 19, 1814...possession of Thomas Dickson Graham of Clearwater Florida, my brother...”  William would be twenty years of age thus considered an adult able to teach.  Youngstown was developing and the first town lot was not recorded until November 1815.  Prior to that time it was often referenced as Martinsburg.  Youngstown is one of the oldest borough’s in Unity Township.

Graham mentions a deed in her book concerning Arthur O’hara, who married Sarah Jackson Graham, William’s widowed mother.   With FHL microfilm at our fingertips I located  an article of agreement 24 September 1792  between O’hara, now deceased, and Henry Furry both of Unity Township.  One of the witness’ is John Chambers.  The document was not filed until 25 May 1814, the year Bernice says the book shows William Graham as a teacher.  William Graham by oath, in 1814, says that he was well acquainted with John Chambers…resided near this deponent in the character of a schoolmaster for several years that the said John Chambers removed from this country about 12 years ago and now resides…Kentucky.[ii]  This document does not clearly state that William Graham is now, himself, a school teacher.  It does tell us that William Graham was likely schooled by John Chambers circa 1802, at about nine years of age, and resided in Unity Township. 

William married Dinah Anne Wilson 16 July 1816, we assume in Westmoreland County, Pennsylvania.  While not listed by name in the 1820 census, this compiler finds the “Widow Ohara” with the correct age for her along with the family of William and Dinah Wilson Graham.[iii]  William already has three children. The first daughter named Sarah, possibly after her grandmother, was born that year.

Arthur O'hara, who married Sarah Jackson Graham[iv] about 1806 died before the deed in 1814 and probate records continue thru August 1825.[v]  William Graham is cited in the partition docket. William Graham, appears in his own household in Unity Township in 1830.  By 1830 he and Dinah have nine children.

Bernice states in her publication: Some time in...& before the birth of ...youngest child, William...disappeared and was never heard from again by anyone in the family or area..”   Deborah was born 4 January 1832 and the last child Richard Wright Graham was born November 1833.

Eleven children in the household and father, William Graham disappears.  The last two children are thought to have been born in Sewickly Township, where Dinah’s father, William Wilson, resided.  It is assumed that Dinah is being helped by her father, William Wilson, until his death in June 1848.  But it was six long years before Dinah Anne Wilson Graham received three annual payments of $300.00 from her father’s will.  Eleven children being raised during the Panic of 1837 when unemployment was at it's lowest, money was devalued and banks were passing out bad loans. The recession lasted seven long  years.

Logically, Dinah would try to locate her husband. Scant newspaper scans have surfaced  for The Gazette and Farmers & Mechanic’s Register (1828-1833) or the Greensburg Gazette/Register.  This compiler has found no newspaper article, at this writing, concerning his disappearance.  Dinah Anne would need money to feed that many children.  Usually guardianships are appointed at the death of a father, even though the mother was living.  A guardian appointment was put in place to manage finances and the best interest of the child.  Orphans Court, for Westmoreland County, show no entry for any of the children. Often the sheriff and courts would intervene to aid those in need. There are no land holdings in Westmoreland County, Pennsylvania in William Graham’s name either.  This is a family without a breadwinner, the eldest son Wilson Graham being about 16 years old.  Bernice states that Wilson Graham felt a responsibility to help the family and family stated he rode a horse along the towpath of a canal in Pennsylvania to help make ends meet.  The Pennsylvania Canal System began in 1824 so fits nicely into the story of the family.

Bernice gave assumptions that Sarah Jackson Graham O’hara’s husband was a Jared Graham, father of William.  The trail Bernice provided was later proven by several researcher’s to be Jared Graham that married Jane Nyce and migrated to Pickaway County, Ohio.  This compiler feels there is possibly several contemporary Jared Graham’s that still need reviewed and unraveled.  There are several Scotch Irish Graham families in the vicinity.    DNA shows that this compiler does have low centimorgans to at least two issues of the Pickaway County Graham family.

Dinah Anne Wilson Graham migrated with her family to Wesley Township, Washington county, Ohio where she resided among her grown children and grandchildren.   She died in the home of grandson Thomas Graham in Bern Township, Athens County 14 March 1879 on a visit from neighboring Washington County.  Most documents call her “Ann Graham.”  She was never referenced as a widow in any documents reviewed by this writer.  Bernice Graham’s statement still holds true “William Graham disappeared.”

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[i] 1929, Aug 2 Dessie Feyler to Bernice Graham…”…impossible for us to attend reunion…returned home from Michigan yesterday and had a nice visit with Eva.. She and I filled out the form you sent…”

[ii] Pennsylvania, Westmoreland, Deeds, Volume 10, p 631, fhl microfilm 008036029, image 72.

[iii] 1820 Federal census, M33-112 Unity, Westmoreland, PA page 174

[iv] Sarah Jackson Graham O’Hara b. 1760 was contemporary to Richard Jackson b c. 1775 m. Jane Seaton resided in Westmoreland County. Jane Seaton Jackson’s brother George was a well known hatter.

[v] Pennsylvania, Westmoreland Registers and Orphan Ct Recod Index; O’Hara Arthur acct 1 OC 182 1819 , partition 5C PN 242 1825